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It's been a long time

Hello friends. It has been a very long time indeed since I posted here. SO so so so much in that time. Incredible work. Divorce.Moving. New love. Moving again. Yes, I now live in Austin, TX. I have wanted to come and write, but every single time I looked at a blank journal page, I froze. What to say. So awkward. So exhausted. But, here I am, now. Feeling a bit more like a real, live person. Still up in the air, but I can see the earth now. I am living with my partner Simon. I got here in November. A couple trips and the holidays, and some settling in are the chief pursuits of the last months. Yesterday we set up the garage as a studio. We must be far along at settling me in. I have also been getting to know town, and, more so really, the wild areas of Austin. I put back on most of the 15 pounds I lost and hence people are no longer horrified at my appearance. I have found No Shame Theater here. I have watched movies and all of Downton Abbey. I spent last year in Berkeley, CA with my dear, dear college friend Christine. My hair is quite long and has big fat blond chunks in a few spots. My hands still bother me, but I am seeing a magical chiropractor who is helping me. I did a period book cover last year. I have a picture on a vinyl record coming out soon. Not too much shooting work, but some archive orders in the last year. Still sorting out the next step professionally. Thinking of taking a year's cycle here in Austin before really trying to sort out our next master plan. Life - who knew? I mean to start writing now, so I hope I will find words to share here. I have been reading the whole time I have been away. So, it has been nice to feel you all out there. xo
And, here, to begin, that most enigmatic of forms, the cestina.

Paysage Moralise

Hearing of harvests rotting in the valleys,
Seeing at end of street the barren mountains,
Round corners coming suddenly on water,
Knowing them shipwrecked who were launched for islands,
We honour founders of these starving cities
Whose honour is the image of our sorrow,

Which cannot see its likeness in their sorrow
That brought them desperate to the brink of valleys;
Dreaming of evening walks through learned cities
They reined their violent horses on the mountains,
Those fields like ships to castaways on islands,
Visions of green to them who craved for water.

They built by rivers and at night the water
Running past windows comforted their sorrow;
Each in his little bed conceived of islands
Where every day was dancing in the valleys
And all the green trees blossomed on teh mountains,
Where love was innocent, being far from cities.

But dawn came back and they were still in cities;
No marvellous creature rose up from the water;
There was still gold and silver in the mountains
But hunger was a more immediate sorrow,
Although to moping villagers in valleys
Some waving pilgrims were describing islands . . .

'The gods,' they promised, 'visit us from islands,
Are stalking, head-up, lovely, through our cities;
Now is the time to leave your wretched valleys
And sail with them across the lime-green water,
Sitting at their white sides, forget your sorrow,
The shadow cast across your lives by mountains.'

So many, doubtful, perished in the mountains,
Climbing up crags to get a view of islands,
So many, fearful, took with them their sorrow
Which stayed them when they reached unhappy cities,
So many, careless, dived and drowned in water,
So many, wretched, would not leave their valleys.

It is our sorrow. Shall it melt? Then water
Would gush, flush, green these mountains and these valleys,
And we rebuild our cities, not dream of islands.

-- W. H. Auden
Hey Folks - I know, I have not been around here much. The madness is hot and heavy around here, and you'll mostly find me shucking and jiving over at Facebook as a professional focus especially.

In the mean time, I have a question for the serious ebayers out there.

I just sold my Noblex panorama camera to a person in Thailand. Before I sold it, I put fresh batteries in it and tested its finicky self out at all speeds, wherein it performed like a champ. I did not send it to the shop for eval, but it appeared good to my professional user's eye.

Well, said buyer has gotten the camera. He says he has another (he? she? I think Chusak is a male name...) Noblex and that this one is not working at slow speeds, needing help to finish its rotation for exposure. Now I am not one to call someone a liar. But where do I go with this? Is it true? If so, is it my fault? He wants me to look into getting it fixed for him, which would likely involve several hundred dollars in international shipping and fees. I did not have returns on it and I do not want to take it back (hello loss of $60 in shipping). But that would be cheaper. ALso, what if it is not working and it is his fault? That's not fair. It was shipped in it's original form fitted styrofoam and box, plus in an exterior box filled with peanuts.

Any ideas on how this should go? I so do not want the angst. Nor do I want to suck up $60 in shipping.

I have suggested he run a roll of film through it in case his judgement is off. But really, again, what if he killed the camera? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

Happy New Year

Well, the holiday greetings and wrap up has been slow in coming, most especially since Lee has been so sick. But, I wanted to get it out here on New Year's before that festive feeling fades and I can be accused of being, well, lame. It was a jam packed year. If we have left something out (which we must have since the letter was not 16 pages long this year), feel free to suggest an addition : )

Without further ado, and with much love and hope for joyous and rewarding new year:

Moyers 2009 - card, letter, and slide show


alys695Asmall, originally uploaded by compassionateeye.

My first post of 2010. Off we go! This time last year I had no idea I'd be known as the mermaid photographer. Now my goals are deeply wrapped up in making this body of work expand and progress. Here is our young guest Alys from the summer. It is ajust a proof for her, but I like where it appears to be headed, difficult exposure or not.


091221LeFleurPR-260C, originally uploaded by compassionateeye.

Pendulum's Duo L&S - Luis and Suzanne in their new trapeze act Le Fleur. HOT STUFF!


I received notice yesterday athat one of my pieces was accepted for the Ex Arte Equinus competition by Art Horse Magazine. It was awarded 3rd place in the photography category. Entering was one of my launch activities - I am so pleased!

I wanted to share this holiday image that Lee did for Iraq Veterans against the war. Please send it to any vets you know - we want them to know people are thinking of them and working for their benefit.


0910PinupStacey-57BFlat, originally uploaded by compassionateeye.

It has been fun watching her make people stutter. I can't believe she's never really modeled before. Henna by rovinghorse at Roving Horse Henna.